Our Notes

Katie's Notes

CHUUK WOMEN’S CONFERENCE
SESSION FIVE

I. Definition of Purity
A. What it IS
1. the will of God (1 Thes. 4:3-8)
a. to be sanctified, made holy, like Christ
b. to have self-control (Fruit of the Spirit)
2. God’s perfect design for His creation (Gen 2:24)
a. 1 man
b. 1 woman
c. 1 marriage
3. staying away from sexual immorality
B. What it is NOT
1. sexual immorality (Gal. 5:19; Eph. 5:5; Col. 3:5, Heb. 13:4)
a. immoral – any form of wrong sexual behavior
(1) fornication – sex before you’re married
(2) adultery – sex with someone other than your spouse
(3) homosexuality – sex with someone of the same gender
b. anything that will lead to such behavior (1 Cor. 6:18)
2. lustful thoughts (Mat. 5:27-30, 15:19)
a. even thoughts are serious
b. Jesus tells us to take drastic measures to
prevent this
3. lasting joy and peace
a. moment of physical pleasure
b. guilt and shame
(1) for you
(2) for your future spouse (or current
spouse)

II. Biblical Examples
A. Joseph – GOOD (Gen. 39)
1. Recognizes sin – before you get in a situation know what is okay and what is not okay
2. Stays away from tempting situations.
3. Flees – runs away as fast as he can.
** Remember, Kim said that no one is perfect and that even Christians sin.
B. King David – BAD (2 Sam. 11:1-4, 27)
1. David wasn’t where God wanted him to be.
2. David took baby steps into sin.
C. King David – GOOD (2 Sam. 12:13-14, Psalm 51:1-4)
1. Confess.
2. Repent.
3. God forgives us. (1 John 1:9)

Emily to answer specific questions.

Emily's Notes:

1. Is dating a good thing for teenagers?

If “dating” is building friendships with guys in group settings, yes, “dating” is a good way to practice communication skills and relating to guys.

If dating is spending time alone with a guy, it is NOT a good idea. It will likely lead to an emotionally or physically intimate relationship that would be wrong outside of marriage. Also, it is not good for young people who are not spiritually, emotionally, academically and financially read to consider marriage to be pursuing this kind of relationship.


2. What if my future husband is not pure?

If your future husband is not pure, that will be a difficulty in your relationship, but you can forgive him, just as God forgives him.

3. Is it good for two people to be together if they stay pure?

It might be good. Be careful! Serious relationships are usually not a good idea at a young age because they are likely to end in heartbreak. You and he may change a lot in the next few years, especially with big changes like going to college. The most important thing is to grow in your maturity with the Lord and trust Him to bring the right person AT THE RIGHT TIME!

4. If I’ve been kissed, am I still pure?

That is a personal question. Did kissing cause you to think impure thoughts? Did it develop emotions that are too strong for someone who isn’t ready to get married? That is a boundary you need to set for yourself, but my advice is to save your kisses for your spouse-this is a way to FLEE temptation. Instead of asking, “How far can I go?” We should ask, “How pure can I be?”

5. What can I say if my boyfriend asks me to have sex with him?

NO! He should not by your boyfriend if he asks you to have sex with him. He is not looking out for your best interest if he wants you to have sex with him. He is being selfish. If you think it is okay to have a boyfriend, you should have one that cares about following God and helping to keep you both pure.






6. Is it true that having sex will make love between two people grow strong and last forever?

God designed sex to unite two people in a VERY strong and SPECIAL relationship, but sex outside of marriage is NOT God’s design, and will NOT lead to strong and lasting love. Instead, it will likely lead to shame and sadness. It could also lead to sexually transmitted diseases, HIV and AIDS, or unwanted pregnancy.


7. Is it okay to date more than one guy?

Again this depends on what you mean by “date.” I don’t think you should spend time alone with any guys! It is important to be honest. Do NOT let one guy think he is having a special friendship with you if you are secretly having the same type of relationship with someone else.

8. Is it good to date a non-Christian?

NEVER! It is NEVER good to date a non-Christian. People who date fall in love and people who fall in love usually want to get married! You do not want to date (or think about dating) a non-Christian because you do NOT want to marry a non-Christian. You want to marry someone who has the same beliefs and ideas about living life that you do. If Christ is the most important person in your life, it is VERY important that Christ is the most important person in his life, too. If you are dating a non-Christian, you are showing that you love yourself more than you love the Lord. Also, you cannot have a REAL relationship with someone if you are trying to change them. Only God can change a person’s heart to love Him. Not only should you wait for a Christian, but a guy who is running after the Lord as fast and strong as you are! I heard before that you should run with all your heart to the Lord, and one day, you may look over and see a guy who is running as fast and hard as you are.

9. Is my boyfriend going to hate me if I don’t kiss him?

He might! But that just means he doesn’t respect you and you don’t want him to be your boyfriend anyway! If you’re going to have a boyfriend, choose someone that respects your standards and your desire to be pure and follow God.

10. What if my boyfriend wants to marry me?

You still need to STAY pure! Protect yourself from the temptation to have sex before you are actually married. Also, be sure you are right with the Lord, pray, seek counsel from your family and maybe a pastor who knows your boyfriend. Is he someone that you think you could honor and respect for the rest of your life? Does he demonstrate a love for God and you? Is he a person that shows responsibility-would you trust him to take care of you and your family? If not, you two need to go your separate ways.

11. What is the purpose of dating?

A wrong purpose for dating is to enjoy the feelings of being in love when you are not ready for lasting commitment or marriage. The problem is not enjoying romance, but taking it outside of God’s design. God wants romantic love to be between one man and one woman who get married because those feelings are supposed to lead to a physical relationship. If you are seriously ready to consider marriage, a better purpose for dating would be to find and get to know someone that you might marry.


12. Is it okay to date someone who is married?

NEVER. And why would you want to date him anyway? He is obviously a selfish person because he wants to have a wife and a girlfriend. Think about how you would be hurting his marriage and family. You would be dishonoring God’s design.

13. What do I do if I know my boyfriend has another girlfriend?

Be honest. If you thought it was a special relationship with only you, tell him. If you tell him that he hurt you, and he doesn’t apologize or change, move on! You deserve someone better!

14. How can I know a guy loves me?

To truly love you the best way, he first needs to know the true love of God the Father. If he is a Christian and he is showing that he loves you, he will be protecting your purity and looking out for your best interest. He will show that he loves you with action. Do not be fooled by someone who SAYS he loves you, but consistently speaks mean words or does mean things to you.

15. When should I come home from a date?

BEFORE you are tempted! Remember, it is not a good idea to spend time alone with a guy, especially in the dark. Also, you should come home when your parents tell you to!

16. Do men stay pure too?

Yes, some men, who are following God’s plan for their lives, stay pure. Other men may not stay pure. ALL men and women are commanded by God to stay pure.

17. Is daydreaming bad?

If it is making you think lustful thoughts, yes. It may also be bad if you are daydreaming about a certain guy and your feelings for him are growing too strong. Remember, your first love should be Christ. You should spend the MOST time with the Lord.

18. Is holding hands okay?

This is a personal decision according to what it means to you and what it makes you feel. If it makes you want to touch him more and more, maybe it is better not to touch at all. Also, is it culturally acceptable and if your mother knew you were doing it, would she think it was okay? Remember, the Bible says honor your father and mother!



19. What can we do on a date that won’t cause temptation?

Probably anything in a group. Also, try to pick things that help you get to know the other person. (Watching a movie together does not help you to know his personality and values.) Try to DO things-maybe a service project, a youth group event, a picnic with friends, or sports.

20. Is it sinful for married women to lose their purity?

Yes, we should stay pure even after we are married. But having sex with your husband is NOT impure. God designed and wants sex to be a wonderful experience, which draws you and your husband together. Remember, impurity is having (or thinking about having) sex before marriage, sex with someone who is not your spouse or sex with someone of the same gender.

21. Why do we have to keep our purity if the guys we’re going to marry fool around?

Because God said so! He did NOT say, “You only have to stay pure if he does.” God is not trying to keep you from having FUN – he wants you to have the MOST fun and pleasure. You will have the BEST experience if you follow God’s design.

Women's Conference

Ack! Katie and I are speaking at the Women's Conf at LMC tomorrow. Pray for us - our topic is purity!

Decisions, Decisions, Decisions

I was having a discussion with Director today about some different decisions that I’ve been thinking about. At the end, I added how much I missed Mexican food and especially cheese.

I have decided that I will not be coming back to teach at Mizpah next year. As stated before, I have applied to graduate school. I have not yet heard back from them but there are other ministries and places that I’ve been looking into as well. Please, continue to pray for God’s clear guidance and a willingness to do what He asks.

After my conversation with Director, I went to town to run some errands. I haven’t been able to find any butter/margarine lately and was met with a very empty refrigerator aisle when I got to the store. So I was walking down with a mopey look on my face… when what to my wondering eyes should appear but cheddar and jack cheese! I was acting fairly goofy, especially being all by myself, but didn’t care because I was so thrilled that there was finally cheese! I had not expected it, I had not even asked for it, but God provided a wonderful blessing. So I didn’t get butter, but I did get something way better.

And it reminded me that if God is SO COOL in the little things, He’ll do just marvelously with the big stuff too!

PRAISE THE LORD!

Love,
Katie

In the same way, the Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness. He himself intercedes for us!

PRs

1Parent-Teacher Conferences Today
2Timely & God-glorifying completion of the yearbook, which is now mostly in Miss Pearl’s hands (in Guam)
3Sumantha – we took her and Arlene to dinner on Wednesday night. After we dropped Arlene off at home, Sumantha asked us to pray for her dad b’c he left the family and now doesn’t seem to care about his own children.
4Women’s Conference NEXT weekend. Pray for me & Katie as we prepare a segment on physical purity.
5Track & Field Day – that Mizpah students will be a light
6Junior Retreat coming up in a couple weeks
7Nick & Ana as they make decisions about the future
8Emily & Katie as they make decisions about the future
9And, of course, continued prayer for teachers and students

In the same way, the Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness. He himself intercedes for us!

PRs

Parent-Teacher Conferences Today
Timely & God-glorifying completion of the yearbook, which is now mostly in Miss Pearl’s hands (in Guam)
Sumantha – we took her and Arlene to dinner on Wednesday night. After we dropped Arlene off at home, Sumantha asked us to pray for her dad b’c he left the family and now doesn’t seem to care about his own children.
Women’s Conference NEXT weekend. Pray for me & Katie as we prepare a segment on physical purity.
Track & Field Day – that Mizpah students will be a light
Junior Retreat coming up in a couple weeks
Nick & Ana as they make decisions about the future
Emily & Katie as they make decisions about the future
And, of course, continued prayer for teachers and students

The Best Wreck Diving in the World!

And to think I almost didn't go (because my ear hurt). It was sooo AWESOME! We went to two shallow wrecks today, both Japanese ships sunk in WWII. At the first site, we went 60 ft for about 40 minutes. AND WE SAW A SHARK!!!!!!!!!!!! At the second site, we went 60 ft for about 35 minutes. The plants and fish were AMAZING! Wow! Sorry, couldn't get any pics for you! But here is one of Katie having some "surface time" between dives at another island.





PTL for a successful Spring Break (if the goal was fun and relaxation..:) )





Oh, the interesting people diving with us: A graduate student from the Netherlands finishing a three month study on what kids want to be when the grow up (she was also a newbie diver - certified at Truk Stop), 2 chefs (from Germany & New Zealand) who came on a ship that has been cruising in many adventurous places - like Antarctica (apparently, most of their passengers are bird watchers! and the crew is Russian), and also an Australian diver (He listed places all over the world that he has been diving, and said Chuuk is the only place where he made it a point to come back.) Our instructor is an interesting fellow, too. From Waco, TX (but more recently from Mexico). He said he owned a photolab and studio for 17 years before he got into diving. It is really interesting to hear his perceptions of the Chuukese culture. :) All in all, we had a blast under the water and meeting new people. (Hahaha! PADI propoganda.)

Alright, you kids, back to work!!!

Ok, ok, ok...and here's me on the dive boat...just to prove I was there! (BTW, we're really excited about getting diver t-shirts, now!)

Diving, School, Korea

4/13/07 Open Water Dive #1 35 feet, 24 minutes
4/15/07 Open Water Dive #2 40 feet, 20 minutes (we were going to do some more swimming around after some training exercizes, but my ear started to hurt pretty bad. :( )
Tomorrow Open Water Dives #3-4 (Lord willing) at 2 shallow wrecks!!!

Pray for safety, endurance, comfort & that we'll have a blast! :) Pray for my ear not to hurt, and Katie to feel well! Thanks! We are having a good time, and so glad we 'braved' the waters.

School was supposed to start again on Tuesday, but it looks like classes will be cancelled for the burial of the former president of Micronesia, which will be taking place here in Mwan village (Apparently, he is the grandfather of a former student?)

Oh! PTL for Korea tickets by Grace (no, really, that was the gal's name)! Katie and I will go to Korea May 28-June 4 to visit with our missionary friends, Manuel and MiHamm. We are so grateful and thankful to our Lord for this exciting opportunity, and also to our friends' invitation.

Pray for:

The infection on my foot to heal
Us to be able to finish up our diving courses with school starting up again
Us to be ready for school to start again on Tuesday
To finish the semester strong – and with our students learning a lot!
For wise decisions about what we will do this summer and next fall
For teachers for next year (like Mr. Wenzle to come to Chuuk and teach English!)
For us (as well as Linda Chiles & Kim Gardell) to prepare for the Women’s Conference
FOR ME TO FINISH UP THE YEAR BOOK ASAP!

Thank Him for:

The opportunity we had to enjoy the “great creatures of the sea and every living and moving thing with which the water teems” that God created on the 5th day.
Also, the safety and BRAVERY we had while diving. *smile*

The BIG bug:

Becko came to our door and said he had something for me. I said, “Is it for me and Miss Katie, should we wait for her?” He said that it was for his, “best friend *pause* favorite teacher.” [The day before when he came to the house and Katie was in her room, he said “Where’s my FUTURE teacher?” –Katie doesn’t have the pleasure of teaching the freshmen.] Anyway, I could tell he was holding something behind his back and asked, “Becko, is that a gecko?” “No.” “Are you going to splash water on me?” “No, come outside so I can give it to you.” I timidly went outside. Then, he produced it. He assured me that his dad had taken the stingers out, so it was no longer poisonous. Haha! It still took BRAVERY for me to hold it! Katie wouldn’t even get close to it.

ONE MORE THING:

I FOUND MY SOCIAL SECURITY CARD. Wanna know where it was??? MY WALLET!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. And to think God could use ME. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. What a privilege to be even a foolish servant in the house of my Lord. *smile*

Fear Factor Comes to Chuuk

I have the opportunity to share my testimony with my students in so many ways. Last week, for example, Way-One started a discussion about love and marriage (which it seems to me he thinks is the most important thing in life.) However, I asked, “Way-One, what is your goal in life?” He said, “To be happy.” “Ok. There is only one thing that will make you happy.” “I know. God. And then having a wife, and a house, and a car…” “No! No!,” I shouted. “Only God, trust me.” Later that day (or week), he was up at the staff house and I was asking him whether he would go on his mission (Mormon) after high school because I haven’t heard him talk about college as much lately (he used to always talk about BYU). He said he was trying to be worthy. I wasn’t sure whether he meant worthy to go on the mission or worthy by going on the mission. Again, I said, “Nothing you do can make you worthy. There’s only ONE-WAY (his name!) that you can be worthy. Jesus Christ.” He says he knows, but he demonstrates that he believes Jesus Christ plus, plus. Also, he seems kind of…I don’t know, depressed? Searching?

Today, we had Cruz (Katie’s former student that got expelled) to the house. He was waiting for us when we came home from Logan’s 10 AM service, which we attended after Berea’s Sunrise service, egg hunt, and breakfast. I didn’t see the Betel Nut (at first), but he had that lime-powered stuff they use with it tied in a baggy around his finger. He came into the house and looked at some pictures from Mizpah’s Spring Banquet etc. He told us how he “loved” one of the senior girls and wanted to “marry her.” He said he would stop chewing, smoking etc. if He could be with her. We got into a discussion about betel nut, cigarettes, and marijuana. He said he was 12 when he started smoking and 13 when he started chewing. His older cousins and friends had told him to try it. I asked him whether he tended to do those things when he was bored or lonely. He shrugged and said no. Though, I think if he really thought about it, it would be true…afterall, he doesn’t do anything, but work and sit around chewing and smoking! Anyway, I shared with him that the reason I asked is because I used to do some of those things, but mostly it started because I was bored and lonely. I told him I had wanted to live the way that I wanted to, rather than the way that God wanted me to. Now, I know living His way is infinitely better!!! He smiled and laughed. He said girls always wanted boys to stop smoking and chewing. After a little while, we decided to watch a movie, but he really wanted to chew betel nut (at this time he produced a specimen from his hat). We told him he couldn’t chew betel nut inside or immediately outside of our house. He was so antsy and could hardly concentrate. He never did finish the movie. Man! I don’t want anything to control my life that much even if it isn’t a carcinogen!

So…continue to pray for Way-One and for Cruz.

Spring Break –

Well, we are now off of school for a week. Thursday we went to the store with Maverick, and then picked up a pizza from Truk Stop. Yesterday, Good Friday, we slept in, and then Lillian & Peterson came up to the house and cleaned for us (Wow! What a blessing! Thoughtful servants.) At 3:00 we went to church at Logan. There was a guest from the Gideon Bible Society (or whatever it’s called) that spoke at the end. He was from China (I think). He was difficult for Katie and me to understand, but poor Jaffe (LMC church president) had to translate into Chuukese. Then, Katie and I went to dinner at Blue Lagoon. Last night at about 10 (I was already in bed), Spencer and Becko knocked on the door. Katie said when she opened it, they were on all fours pretending to eat from our dogs’ dishes. They are so hilarious. They also have this pantomime routine they do where they pretend to splash water on one another. We hope to get it on video for you to enjoy. Our students are so creative in their humor. This morning we needed to go pay for cash power. The system has changed, so now we have to pay in advance. My student, Same-Me, came with us. While Katie went into pay for power, Same-Me and I went into the store next door, a woman approached us (whom I recognized from Berea) to invite us to tomorrow’s sunrise service. I asked her to show me where, so she took me on a short walk out behind the store. When Katie found us, she took the three of us upstairs into her home and gave us crackers and drinks. Her husband is now retired, but was a doctor at the hospital. I thought she was Filipino, but Nic later said that she is Chinese. Anyway, I guess Manuel and MiHamm have been staying with her b’c his parents are staying in the guest apartment at Berea. Manuel’s parents were missionaries here for many years, and have returned for a bi-centenial celebration. Manuel’s dad will be preaching at Berea’s sunrise service tomorrow. While we (Katie, Same-Me, and I) were having punch with Helen (the Chinese/Filipino/Chuukese store-owner), a Chuukese woman came into the house and said that someone was looking for us. When we went back into the store, it was Nic and he had locked his keys in the car. For once, we got to rescue the Olandes!!! (Of course, usually Nic is rescuing us.) After that we went to another store, and Katie got to see her former student, Cruz, (he is working now – and had a big bulge of betel nut in his cheek!) We keep inviting him to stop by our house. Maybe he will over Spring Break. Our other Spring Break plan is SCUBA diving w/ Truk Stop! We are so excited, and kind of nervous! Haha! I showed Katie a picture of a shark this morning in National Geographic. She wasn’t very happy with me. Anyway, we are supposed to pick up the initial reading materials and a DVD tomorrow. Then, take a test on Monday. When the SCUBA instructor said we could pick up the materials on Sunday, I said “Easter?” He told me that on Easter he gets up early to see where everyone hides the eggs, and then while they go to church, he gets them and eats the candy! I didn’t laugh. I wonder what he read from the expression on my face!?!? Anyway, he seems like a nice guy. He recently moved here from west Texas. Back to today, we had cheeseburgers with Same-Me at Café 257, and now we’re back home. So…a pretty good start for the break, I’d say. PTL.

Pray for...

My frosh-they have their first test of quarter 4 tomorrow on Rome- esp. pray for Spencer and Becko.

Me-I'm tryin' to get back in shape for the muumuu-less states, but I eat sooo much when school stresses me out. :)

Way-One *sigh* and all my students who haven't truly been changed by His saving grace.
KI and Augustina didn't know what they would say to God if He asked, "Why should I let you into my heaven?" KI is a smart boy and a "good" person, maybe so "good" he doesn't understand his need. Augustina is from a Catholic background. I also talked to Headley after detention on Tuesday. He said he didn't think he was a Christian, he kind of wanted to be one, but he didn't really know what that meant. It's really so amazing that they don't know "The Answer" because they hear the Gospel day after day. I guess that's why we must pray for the Spirit to do His work.

The other student particularly on my heart is Russel because he is so EXTRA rebellious.

Also, pray for Frank, who I think became a Christian on the senior retreat, to grow and mature in his faith.

Foley - he attends Logan and sings his heart out, but has been seen off-campus with betel nut. We are pretty sure he was high at school earlier this week.

Pray for a good Easter Sunday for me and Katie, a time of closeness with the Lord and rejoicing over Christ's sacrifice and LIFE.

PTL
Mesowin's been having a Bible Study on Thursday nights for his neighbors. One of them responded to the altar call at church this last Sunday, and received the Lord during couseling at the end of the service. Also, three ladies went to Linda's Women's Bible Study with Mesowin's wife on Sunday afternoon.

Miss Ana is sick, but feeling better.

Lots of rain lately.

A good run today.

My Senior AP's ACTUALLY doing their work today! Actually, all my classes were RELATIVELY on-task today.

Laughter. Katie was bellowing so loud during class today we could hear her from next door.

Chuukese Mexican food? Yes, we had tacos at a new restaurant with Chiles, Miss Junotte, Dayson, Justin and Franky on Saturday night.

Friendship with Manual and Mihamm and a visit to Berea Church last Sunday.

The opportunities to talk to my students about Christ, and the experiences that I have had in my life that have brought me to know Him-and that He alone satisfies.